writing exercises

ABSTRACT ASSERTIONS -> CONCRETE DETAILS
Re-write these sentences so that they include more concrete and detailed language.

* It was a great party; everybody had fun.
* The film was very interesting.
* Social security is not an entitlement.
* He became extraordinarily angry.

WRITING A MORE COMPLEX THESIS
Notice how by the final version of this thesis, it becomes clear that the idea is primarily about the men's roles in film, as compared to the women's roles.

DRAFT:
Women in contemprorary films are represented as being more sensitive than men.

REVISIONS:
Although women cry more readily in contemporary films, the men, by not crying, seem to win the audience's favor.

The complications that fuel the plots in today's romantic comedies arise because women and men express their sensitivity so differently; the resolutions, however, rarely require men to capitulate.

A spate of recent films has witnessed the emergence of a new "womanly" man as hero, and not surprisingly, his tender qualities seem to be the reason he attracts the female love interest.

QUALIFYING OVERSTATED CLAIMS
Re-write these thesis statements:

* Welfare encourages recipients not to work.
* Herbal remedies are better than pharmaceutical ones.

STYLE
What is the difference between these 2 sentences?

DRAFT: The history of Indochina is marked by colonial exploitation as well as international cooperation.
REVISION: The history of Indochina, although marked by colonial exploitation, testifies to the possibilities of international cooperation.

DRAFT: The president's attitude towards military spending is ambiguous.
REVISION: The president's attitude toward military spending is ambivalent.

These examples are from Writing Analytically by Rossenwasser & Stephen